The play follows the adventures of Rene, the hapless cafe owner in worn-torn occupied France, as he and his wife, Edith, struggle to keep for themselves a priceless portrait stolen by the Nazis and kept in a sausage in the cellar. Rene is hiding two British airmen and is endeavouring, with the help of the Resistance, to repatriate them. However, communications with London through a wireless set disguised as a cockatoo add to the many embarrassments he endures in the company of his patrons. Matters come to a head when news breaks that the Fuhrer is planning to visit the town! Rene needs all the wit he can muster to save his cafe and his life. Come and re-live the TV series, the knockwurst sausages, the fallen Madonna's and the classic phases such as "Listen very carefully, I shall say this only once"!T601840887Director Jane Towers. | |
| 9 Jul 18 to 14 Jul 18 | Little Theatre, Leicester :: V433 listing details L1834774670 |
T01287467573Company Horfield Theatre Company. Director Dom Sugrue. | |
| 25 Oct 17 to 28 Oct 17 | General, Bristol :: V11060188 listing details L0419046094 |
T1645082881Company Derby Shakespeare Theatre Company. | |
| 7 Mar 17 to 11 Mar 17 | Guildhall Theatre, Derby :: V994 listing details L01668121344 |
T071800995Company Phoenix Theatre. | |
| 13 Oct 16 to 15 Oct 16 | Grand Pavilion, Porthcawl :: V838 listing details L0183395764 |
T678476170 | |
| 6 Apr 16 to 9 Apr 16 | Brookside Theatre, Romford :: V0273331991 listing details L01013565875 |
T01041648450Company Grimm Players. | |
| 30 Sep 15 to 3 Oct 15 | Norden Farm Centre for the Arts, Maidenhead :: V1294444431 listing details L01250086191 |
T60298674Presented byLaughlines Ltd. | |
| 13 Feb 15 to 14 Feb 15 | Curve, Leicester :: V830272338 listing details L1991148565 |
T0661085876Company Laughlines Comedy Entertainment. | |
| 1 May 14 to 3 May 14 | Dundee Repertory Theatre, Dundee :: V596 listing details L0799209385 |
T0607137090Company Pump House Theatre Company. | |
| 28 Apr 14 to 3 May 14 | The Pump House Arts Centre, Watford :: V56 listing details L725387473 |
T0909674731Company Grantham Dramatic Society. | |
| 13 Nov 13 to 16 Nov 13 | Guildhall Arts Centre, Grantham :: V447 listing details L902673380 |
T1760495562Approx. Running time: 2hrs (inc. interval) | |
| 14 Nov 13 to 15 Nov 13 | The Landmark, Ilfracombe :: V1177 listing details L28501389 |
T01987934510Company Berwick Amateur Operatic Society. | |
| 19 Oct 12 to 20 Oct 12 | The Maltings, Berwick-on-Tweed :: V986 listing details L366841269 |
T02141145567Company Whitley Bay Theatre Company. | |
| 25 May 11 to 28 May 11 | Whitley Bay Playhouse, Whitley Bay :: V580 listing details L1778451359 |
T02018577218Company Spread Eagle Players. Director Steve Phillips. | |
| 3 Nov 10 to 6 Nov 10 | Bridewell Theatre, Inner London :: V171 listing details L1088385745 |
T01657710074Company Cygnet Players. Director Katy Goddard. | |
| 19 May 10 to 22 May 10 | General, Outer London :: V1087 listing details L0728710599 |
T1392091561Running time 120 mins inclu interval.Producer Calibre Productions. Director James Robert Carson. Design Nancy Surman. Performer Vicki Michelle (Yvette Carte-Blanche). Performer Jeffrey Holland (Rene Artois). Performer Peter Alexander (Captain Von Strohm). Performer Claire Andreadis (Mimi). Performer Judy Buxton (Michelle). Performer Martin Carroll (Captain Bertorelli). Performer Carol Ann Crawford (Edith). Performer Marc Geoffrey (British Airman). Performer Allix Holland (British Airman). Performer Matt Jamie (General Von Schmelling / Officer Crabtree). Performer Nell Jerram (Helga). Performer Richard Mark (The Piano Player). Performer James Rossman (Herr Otto Flick). Performer Richard Tate (M. Leclerc). Performer Robin Sebastian (Lieutenant Gruber). | |
| 15 Jun 09 to 20 Jun 09 | Malvern Theatres, Malvern :: V01718852442 listing details L1597644832 |
| 8 Jun 09 to 13 Jun 09 | Theatre Royal Windsor, Windsor :: V742 listing details L708500817 |
| 4 Jun 09 to 6 Jun 09 | Venue Cymru (formerly - North Wales Theatre), Llandudno :: V848 listing details L0931729076 |
| 1 Jun 09 to 3 Jun 09 | Victoria Theatre, Halifax :: V969 listing details L01413868178 |
| 26 May 09 to 30 May 09 | Grand Theatre, Wolverhampton :: V161 listing details L01593265087 |
| 18 May 09 to 23 May 09 | Eden Court Theatre, Inverness :: V626 listing details L0926520000 |
| 12 May 09 to 16 May 09 | Perth Theatre, Perth :: V637 listing details L02010981 |
| 8 May 09 to 10 May 09 | Sands Centre, Carlisle :: V2 listing details L386563394 |
| 4 May 09 to 6 May 09 | Fareham Live (formerly Ferneham Hall), Fareham :: V767 listing details L0833858587 |
| 27 Apr 09 to 2 May 09 | Lighthouse (previously known as Poole Arts Centre), Poole :: V910 listing details L1537581509 |
| 20 Apr 09 to 25 Apr 09 | Chelmsford Theatre, Chelmsford :: V32 listing details L806805663 |
| 14 Apr 09 to 18 Apr 09 | Key Theatre, Peterborough :: V27 listing details L0852415579 |
| 6 Apr 09 to 11 Apr 09 | Alban Arena, St Albans :: V51 listing details L1318695894 |
| 30 Mar 09 to 4 Apr 09 | Theatre Royal Plymouth, Plymouth :: V895 listing details L0127142583 |
| 23 Mar 09 to 27 Mar 09 | Jersey Opera House, St Helier :: V869 listing details L0414507160 |
| 16 Mar 09 to 21 Mar 09 | Darlington Hippodrome (formerly Civic Theatre), Darlington :: V562 listing details L1658698862 |
| 9 Mar 09 to 14 Mar 09 | Marina Theatre, Lowestoft :: V83 listing details L0452457373 |
| 3 Mar 09 to 7 Mar 09 | Buxton Opera House, Buxton :: V424 listing details L1974189165 |
| 16 Dec 08 to 10 Jan 09 | The Lowry, Salford :: V0655996499 listing details L1846711855 |
| 10 Nov 08 to 15 Nov 08 | Southend Palace Theatre, Westcliff-on-Sea :: V43 listing details L01622339770 |
| 3 Nov 08 to 8 Nov 08 | Devonshire Park Theatre, Eastbourne :: V665 listing details L1206899833 |
| 20 Oct 08 to 25 Oct 08 | Mercury Theatre, Colchester :: V37 listing details L457554757 |
| 13 Oct 08 to 18 Oct 08 | Hull New Theatre, Hull :: V934 listing details L01936234432 |
| 6 Oct 08 to 11 Oct 08 | Connaught Theatre, Worthing :: V725 listing details L0328701625 |
| 30 Sep 08 to 4 Oct 08 | The Orchard, Dartford :: V677 listing details L01136434157 |
| 22 Sep 08 to 27 Sep 08 | Belgrade Theatre, Coventry :: V153 listing details L0988506215 |
| 18 Sep 08 to 20 Sep 08 | New Theatre, Oxford :: V802 listing details L01127704248 |
| 15 Sep 08 to 17 Sep 08 | Grand Opera House, York :: V957 listing details L1746256282 |
| 8 Sep 08 to 13 Sep 08 | Blackpool Grand Theatre, Blackpool :: V518 listing details L1008058949 |
| 29 Aug 08 to 6 Sep 08 | Gordon Craig Theatre, Stevenage :: V53 listing details L0806517544 |
T2140237754Company Street Theatre. Director John McGrouther. | |
| 20 Jun 09 | Strode Theatre, Street :: V917 listing details L01499311299 |
T302813225Company Tiverton Dramatic Society. | |
| 22 Apr 09 to 25 Apr 09 | General, General :: V1267 listing details L1541853640 |
T02008945313Company Green Dragon Yard Theate Company. | |
| 26 Nov 08 to 28 Nov 08 | ARC, Stockton-on-Tees :: V01950064742 listing details L541567894 |
T1908288834Company Harrogate Dramatic Society. | |
| 1 Oct 08 to 4 Oct 08 | Harrogate Theatre, Harrogate :: V942 listing details L1548534757 |
T01602419363Company Wakefield Theatre. | |
| 12 Feb 08 to 16 Feb 08 | Theatre Royal Wakefield, Wakefield :: V979 listing details L1186558028 |
T01528765085Company Atholl Players. | |
| 30 Nov 07 to 1 Dec 07 | Pitlochry Festival Theatre, Pitlochry :: V638 listing details L01930499542 |
T239198903Company Mid Surrey Theatre Company. Director John Taylor. | |
| 21 Nov 07 to 24 Nov 07 | Epsom Playhouse, Epsom :: V699 listing details L1406952782 |
T01873407325Company WOADS. | |
| 22 Nov 07 to 24 Nov 07 | Kenneth More Theatre, Outer London :: V313 listing details L01850715030 |
T01879745473Company Crowthorne Amateur Theatrical Society. | |
| 28 Mar 07 to 31 Mar 07 | General, General :: V1260 listing details L0356908554 |
T01451097508Company Bondgate Players. | |
| 15 Nov 06 to 18 Nov 06 | Darlington Arts Centre, Darlington :: V563 listing details L0278452313 |
T1790922267Company Huddersfield Thespians. | |
| 10 Oct 06 to 14 Oct 06 | Lawrence Batley Theatre, Huddersfield :: V972 listing details L1782603970 |
T2117057584Company Didcot Phoenix Drama Group. | |
| 21 Sep 06 to 23 Sep 06 | Didcot Civic Hall, Didcot :: V1102 listing details L0749559477 |
T02027088272Producer Bruce James Productions. Performer Damian Williams (Rene Artois). Performer Lynette McMurrough (Edith). Performer Natasha Symms (Michelle). Performer Lucinda Rhodes Flaherty (Yvette). Performer Andrew Ryan. | |
| 21 Jun 06 to 24 Jun 06 | The Playhouse, Weston-super-Mare :: V865 listing details L1585319051 |
| 30 May 06 to 3 Jun 06 | Theatre Royal, Margate :: V685 listing details L01080465048 |
| 16 May 06 to 20 May 06 | Pomegranate Theatre, Chesterfield :: V425 listing details L1195729141 |
| 8 May 06 to 13 May 06 | Key Theatre, Peterborough :: V27 listing details L0161448442 |
T01864019580Company Peaslake Players. | |
| 3 May 06 to 6 May 06 | Electric Theatre, Guildford :: V01732805351 listing details L0157412241 |
T0497320065Company Kamamica. | |
| 24 Nov 05 to 26 Nov 05 | Harrogate Theatre, Harrogate :: V942 listing details L575666742 |
T0186160006Company Charity Players. | |
| 19 Oct 05 to 22 Oct 05 | Guild Hall and Charter Theatre, Preston :: V524 listing details L1382873853 |
T0730334812Company Mow Cop Players. | |
| 15 Sep 05 to 17 Sep 05 | Mitchell Arts Centre, Stoke-on-Trent :: V999 listing details L1616351503 |
T0589248670Company Lancaster Footlights Club. | |
| 14 Jun 05 to 18 Jun 05 | Grand Theatre, Lancaster :: V521 listing details L1827617413 |
T01683142866Company Purple Theatre Company. | |
| 8 Jun 05 to 11 Jun 05 | Compass Theatre, Outer London :: V1166 listing details L294880513 |
T710560381Company Car Boot Theatre Company. | |
| 9 Jun 05 to 11 Jun 05 | Theatr Clwyd, Mold :: V810 listing details L891231724 |
T01055531280Company Bancroft Players. Director Sally Hull. | |
| 21 Feb 05 to 26 Feb 05 | Queen Mother Theatre, Hitchin :: V46 listing details L0834943221 |
T1757223813Producer Chesil Theatre. Director Gary Nicholson. Performer Malcolm Brown (Rene). Performer Sue Hake (Edith). Performer Jonathan Gregory (Lieutenant Gruber). Performer Jason Collins (British Airman). Performer Dan Rumney (British Airman). | |
| 5 Dec 04 to 11 Dec 04 | Chesil Theatre, Winchester :: V784 listing details L0278159340 |
T01281520376Company Port Talbot Little Theatre. | |
| 18 Nov 04 to 20 Nov 04 | Princess Royal Theatre, Port Talbot :: V837 listing details L0754625405 |
T0594264377Producer Rainbow 2000. | |
| 9 Nov 04 to 13 Nov 04 | Brentwood Theatre, Brentwood :: V1024 listing details L0791458914 |
T01960554319Company Barnes A House. | |
| 18 Nov 03 to 19 Nov 03 | Christ's Hospital Theatre, Horsham :: V724 listing details L890581360 |
T850519315Company Cosmopolitan Players. Director Bryan Craven. | |
| 23 Oct 03 to 25 Oct 03 | Civic Theatre, Leeds :: V974 listing details L01507334502 |
T1558208250Company Congleton Players. Director Pamela Mien. | |
| 13 Oct 03 to 18 Oct 03 | Daneside Theatre, Congleton :: V469 listing details L01120942211 |
T01984863506Company Mold Players. | |
| 9 Oct 03 to 11 Oct 03 | Theatr Clwyd, Mold :: V810 listing details L1348413377 |
T01045469248Company Studio Theatre Ilfracombe College. | |
| 22 May 03 to 24 May 03 | The Landmark, Ilfracombe :: V1177 listing details L941704475 |
T1890566529Company Newcastle Players. Director Jonathan Fernyhough. | |
| 13 May 03 to 17 May 03 | Mitchell Arts Centre, Stoke-on-Trent :: V999 listing details L2022520704 |
T905955110Company Ayr Fort Players. | |
| 13 May 03 to 15 May 03 | Gaiety Theatre, Ayr :: V591 listing details L0347260967 |
T1975092198Company Phoenix Theatre. | |
| 7 May 03 to 10 May 03 | Arts Centre Theatre (ACT) - formerly Aberdeen Arts Centre, Aberdeen :: V586 listing details L925015961 |
T01741989425Company Mold Players. | |
| 21 Feb 03 to 1 Mar 03 | Theatr Clwyd, Mold :: V810 listing details L0678592570 |
T94228672Company Crescent Theatre Company. | |
| 5 Dec 02 to 21 Dec 02 | Crescent Theatre, Birmingham :: V144 listing details L320108901 |
T881327956Company Wick Theatre Company. | |
| 11 Dec 02 to 14 Dec 02 | General, General :: V617861838 listing details L0649761921 |
T1034429338Company Boston Playgoers. | |
| 23 Oct 02 to 26 Oct 02 | Blackfriars Arts Centre, Boston :: V440 listing details L2014126749 |
T1863443900Company Caught in the Act. | |
| 25 Oct 02 to 26 Oct 02 | Stantonbury Theatre, Milton Keynes :: V752 listing details L01804528505 |
T1939352964Director Rodney Bowen. | |
| 20 Jun 02 to 29 Aug 02 | Pavilions (formely Carlton Theatre), Teignmouth :: V898 listing details L01973297041 |
T02002288001Company Alnwick Theatre Club. Director Tim Frith. | |
| 8 May 02 to 11 May 02 | Playhouse, Alnwick :: V1176 listing details L945350966 |
T697239397Company Leicester Drama Society. | |
| 25 Jun 01 to 7 Jul 01 | Little Theatre, Leicester :: V433 listing details L704218996 |
T0684655996Company The Tamaritans. Director Peter Dann. | |
| 19 Jun 01 to 23 Jun 01 | Theatre Royal Plymouth, Plymouth :: V895 listing details L01054670481 |
T2125058378Company Griffin Players. | |
| 20 Jun 01 to 23 Jun 01 | The Library Theatre, Luton :: V02027386231 listing details L01608235763 |
T01577573957Company Circle Players. | |
| 6 Jun 01 to 9 Jun 01 | General, General :: V1398193254 listing details L01942788382 |
T189478227Company Preston Drama Club. | |
| 22 May 01 to 26 May 01 | Playhouse Theatre, Preston :: V01322424695 listing details L1298063322 |
T1170455560Company Thurrock Courts Players. | |
| 17 May 01 to 19 May 01 | Thameside Theatre, Grays :: V39 listing details L615448778 |
T022396768Company Port Sunlight Players. | |
| 10 May 01 to 12 May 01 | Gladstone Theatre, Port Sunlight :: V033722083 listing details L1500835195 |
T1159956063Gloucestershire PremierCompany Crown Players (in association with France Magazine). Director Graham Lint. | |
| 3 Apr 01 to 7 Apr 01 | The King's Theatre, Gloucester :: V029413031 listing details L01713354602 |
Other listings | |
| 12 Sep 22 to 17 Sep 22 | Bolton Little Theatre, Bolton :: V482 listing details L1290585863 |
| 6 Jul 22 to 9 Jul 22 | Westovian Theatre, South Shields :: V576 listing details L1649948613 |
| 18 Jun 22 | Bowdon Rooms, Altrincham :: V1267053430 listing details L01962894305 |
| 10 May 22 to 14 May 22 | King's Theatre, Newmarket :: V1188 listing details L1675414434 |
| 16 Apr 22 | The Playhouse, Whitstable :: V694 listing details L0705426585 |
| 14 Feb 22 to 19 Feb 22 | Wharf Theatre, Devizes :: V929 listing details L0227603114 |
| 20 Jul 21 to 30 Jul 21 | BLODS Hall, Bexhill-on-Sea :: V1608975836 listing details L0611307853 |
| 10 Mar 20 to 14 Mar 20 | The Playhouse, Halifax :: V971 listing details L01572266711 |
| 14 Nov 19 to 16 Nov 19 | Civic Theatre, Doncaster :: V964 listing details L379145213 |
| 1 Oct 18 to 6 Oct 18 | Hebden Bridge Little Theatre, Hebden Bridge :: V982 listing details L843347837 |
| 16 May 18 to 19 May 18 | Netherton Arts Centre, Dudley :: V116 listing details L01135927534 |
| 9 Dec 17 to 16 Dec 17 | Edward Alderton Theatre, Bexleyheath :: V0895820909 listing details L0490939251 |
| 25 Sep 17 to 27 Sep 17 | Civic Theatre, Doncaster :: V964 listing details L1065053122 |
| 16 May 17 to 19 May 17 | Netherton Arts Centre, Dudley :: V116 listing details L602243222 |
| 8 Jul 16 to 16 Jul 16 | The Apollo Theatre, Newport :: V788 listing details L1993893549 |
| 18 Jun 16 to 25 Jun 16 | Garrick Theatre, Stockport :: V504 listing details L02130360806 |
| 16 Jun 16 to 18 Jun 16 | Royal Court Theatre, Bacup :: V956797776 listing details L0769661676 |
| 31 May 16 to 4 Jun 16 | The Little Theatre, Birkenhead :: V532 listing details L1094838772 |
| 18 Mar 16 to 19 Mar 16 | Uppingham Theatre, Uppingham :: V438 listing details L0853218299 |
| 13 May 15 to 16 May 15 | Seckford Theatre, Woodbridge :: V0396171917 listing details L0564916017 |
| 28 Apr 11 to 30 Apr 11 | Spa Pavilion Theatre, Felixstowe :: V78 listing details L1118651094 |
| 13 May 10 to 15 May 10 | Hyde Festival Theatre, Hyde :: V819939367 listing details L01313696076 |
| 10 Jun 04 to 12 Jun 04 | Prince of Wales Centre, Cannock :: V115 listing details L0121765328 |
| 4 Oct 03 to 11 Oct 03 | Rugby Theatre, Rugby :: V133 listing details L01652235909 |
| 10 Sep 02 to 14 Sep 02 | The Concordia Theatre, Hinckley :: V1180 listing details L401680334 |
| 20 May 02 to 25 May 02 | Playhouse, Erith :: V186 listing details L0395139582 |
| 17 Apr 02 to 20 Apr 02 | The Village Theatre, East Kilbride :: V598 listing details L01268320610 |
| 19 Jun 01 to 23 Jun 01 | Plowright Theatre, Scunthorpe :: V952 listing details L0554420249 |
| 8 Jul 96 to 7 Sep 96 | Pier Theatre, Bournemouth :: V907 listing details L01285142561 |
