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"There's nothing quite like turning up at work to find a 35ft inflatable version of yourself, waving in the breeze, threatening to take out Sophie Ellis-Bextor..." Dragged up by a gogo-dancing alcoholic and 'rescued' from a life of vice by Jehovah's Witnesses, Ophelia Bitz fought her stage-bound destiny as long as possible. But some things you just can't escape...A tale of false eyelashes, religion and the roar of the greasepaint, the smell of the crowd. Clashing songs from Randy Newman, Kurt Weill, Flanders & Swann and Dolly Parton (plus several startling original numbers) with story-telling and libellous anecdotes, Ophelia Bitz's caustic, over-sexed and utterly silly comic style has won her praise and recognition on stages and soap-boxes all over the world.